Spring Break Party Rules

The Frat Boy News Daily College Column
By the editorial staff of De Anza College's La Voz Online

The recent rape allegations involving De Anza College athletes are no doubt shocking. Unfortunately, what is not so shocking is the setting where the alleged crime took place: a house party mixed with drinking and young adults that was a recipe for disaster, evident by the recent charges.

With spring break around the corner, students are already itching to party, making plans for their time to let loose. Spring break partying and vacations sound good in theory, but what many people don't realize is that despite innocent intentions, things can quickly go awry.

Here are a few basic safety tips:

1. Let someone know where you are.
Tell someone who is not going with you where you are going, who you are with, what time you expect to be home and the numbers to reach you. This person will be able to call authorities should you not be home on time or not answer your phone. The earlier the authorities are alerted, the better the chances of finding you safely.

2. Have a designated driver.
If you know that there will be drinking, decide before you go who will remain sober for the drive home. If this person is unable to keep their commitment, call a back-up driver or parent.

3. Have your cell phone with you at all times.
If you don't have one, make sure someone in your group does.

4. Use a buddy system.
This is especially important for women and when going to unfamiliar places. Make an agreement that you will not be separated and will leave together no matter what. Groups are ideal and strongly recommended.

5. Know your limits.
If you must drink, do so in moderation. Drinking increases your risk of being a perpetrator and/or victim of sexual assault, and contributes to poor judgment.

6. Always wear a seatbelt when riding in a car.

7. Trust your intuition.
If something doesn't feel right, leave immediately. In truth, nothing can take back what happened the fateful night of the alleged rape. And while the case has yet to be tried and no formal charges have been made, this is just one instance of far too many alleged cases of date-rape. But if students make smarter decisions and practice safety in a party atmosphere, then perhaps these occurrences can stop altogether.

Newspaper Praises CU Frats for "Maturity, Common Sense and Dedication"

Credit where credit's due

An editorial by the Colorado Daily

If someone had told us five years ago we would some day write an editorial praising fraternities in Boulder for their maturity, common sense and dedication to their community, we would have laughed out loud. After all, the reputation of some of the fraternities - and by association the entire Greek system - has been marred by everything from loud parties to alcohol-related deaths. For a while there it seemed like the fraternity houses on the Hill had been replaced by Al Qaida training camps.

Times have changed. And the most impressive part of the whole transformation of CU's fraternities from soccer hooligans to respectable young men is they did it on their own, without the help or persuasion of the CU administration. Good for the fraternities, we say, for recognizing their own shortcomings and addressing them before it was too late.

Then, to top it all off, the CU Interfraternity Council's (IFC) executive board announced last month plans for a “Social Moratorium,” a two-week hiatus in partying to aid Boulder's 15 fraternity chapters in an ongoing assessment of their risk management policies.

During the moratorium, which ends today, chapters were prohibited from holding any social events in their houses that involve the use of alcohol, giving them an opportunity to improve their safety and risk management procedures with a particular emphasis on holding safe, controlled social events.

Typically, a university or national fraternity imposes such restrictions on partying only after something terrible happens. But reactionary tactics yield almost no benefits for fraternities or the public. What they do create is more hostility between the university and the frats who have grown tired of being blamed for every little thing that happens to drunken partiers in Boulder.

That attitude reached a fever pitch after CU freshman pledge Lynn “Gordie” Bailey was found dead in the Chi Psi fraternity house on the Hill in September 2004 after a night of initiation that included the consumption of mass quantities of alcohol.

Shortly thereafter, the University demanded that CU fraternities and sororities abandon fall rush. The sororities bowed to the university, but the fraternities refused. In retaliation, the university dissociated itself from all fraternities.

The move to stand up to the university was a smart one. No one, save the family, mourned the death of Bailey more than his fraternity brothers. Punishing the fraternity involved and its members was appropriate, but meddling in the affairs of other fraternities was not.

The unfounded bias against fraternities became even more evident a few months after Bailey's death when another student, 21-year-old Bryan Merritt, was found dead in his dorm room. Even before the facts of the case were clear, fingers were pointed at a fraternity that hosted a party the night before Merritt was found. He had attended the party, but by all accounts was not drunk. Despite the efforts of the fraternity - which checked IDs and had police on hand to administer breathalyzer tests - they were blamed for the death. They were later cleared of any wrongdoing.

The moratorium enacted in February represents a new approach for the Greek community. CU Greek Advocated Marc Stine said, since October, the IFC noticed a trend towards noisier parties. Fraternity-police liaisons, he said, expressed concern about the problem, and the IFC took action. They held a risk management meeting which included fraternity presidents, social chairs, house managers, risk managers, and new member education chairs, who heard presentations from the Boulder Police and Fire Departments, national fraternity legal counsel, specialists in fraternity operations, and IFC officers.

This proactive approach to problem-solving received praise from some university officials as well as police and fire representatives. Boulder's Fire Safety Educator Sherry Kenyon went so far as to call the decision “mature.”

Again, not a word we thought we'd ever be using to describe a Boulder fraternity.

The efforts of the IFC to control fraternities and to take the safety and reputation of its members into its own hands has been nothing short of astonishing. It's the kind of thing that used to be expected of Greek organizations. We think the university should take its lumps, admit the fraternities have done a great job of self-policing, and allow them back on campus.

Frat Boy News Exclusive: College Students Taking the Term "Higher" Education Literally

The Frat Boy News Daily College Column
By Pat Connelly, Co-Editor of The Frat Boy News

Here's a stunner from a study at Columbia University - Nearly half of all 5.4 million full-time college students in the United States spend at least one weekend a month either binge drinking or using drugs.

A report published in Thursday's USA Today says Columbia scientists are starting to become worried for America's youth as substance abuse and alcohol abuse are becoming increasingly popular on college campuses.

Alcohol seems to be the substance of choice for most college students, but students are also using prescription pills and marijuana to get their monthly fix, the study says. The study, performed by Columbia's National Center on Addiction and Substance Abuse, took a survey of some 2,000 students and 400 campus administrators to find the "shocking" results.

The study found that white students are more inclined to binge activities, and that 22.9 percent of college students meet the criteria for the medical definition of alcohol or drug dependence or abuse

"It's not on the radar screen of college presidents. This is not a priority," Joseph Califano said, the president of the study committee. "We believe they have an obligation to protect the health and safety of their students."

Students everywhere seem to be making their chosen "extra-curricular activities" a priority. What the study didn't examine though may be most crucial. Last I heard, collective GPAs of all college students were reportedly higher than they have ever been before. If students are getting their work done in the classroom, doesn't that entitle them to do what they wish in their free time?

Pat Connelly is the co-edior of The Frat Boy News and a 2006 alumnus of Washington and Jefferson College's Gamma chapter of Delta Tau Delta.

The Difference Between Pledging and Hazing

The Frat Boy News Daily College Column
By Justin Poythress, Vanderbilt University

The issue of fraternity hazing is a rather old one in the sense that it has been debated countless times in countless different environments and situations. However, in light of the latest incident in this long chain affecting Phi Kappa Psi, I feel it is important to discuss some basic realities people seem unwilling to face.

Every organization employs some form of hazing, or, more accurately, a new member initiation process. Each organization has its own individual traits, regulations and expectations and new members must learn and accept these before they are able to display the identity of the larger group. Whether this process is something basic such as a list of rules on a sheet you must sign, such as the Honor Code, or something more intricate and intense like military boot camp, the processes exist universally.

Now, in our specific university situation, the difference I see between pledging and hazing is that hazing is any process meant to make new members feel inferior or uncomfortable in any way; more specific guidelines are comprehensive and numerous. Just so we're on the same plane here, it should also be understood that all fraternities, if examined closely, probably would be found in violation of the hazing policy. It should also be noted that there will rarely be a “hazing incident” resulting in disciplinary action unless a disgruntled pledge snitches on his own group.

However, I would argue that the university should remove the choke-chain from the fraternities. I am not a member of a fraternity, but I have seen these foolish and destructive measures taken in the name of creating a safe environment. No matter what rules exist, there will always be ways to get around them to allow a fraternity to do whatever it likes in secret. I also think it is fair to say that in the long run, nobody, especially the fraternity, wishes to see pledges getting beaten, set on fire or poisoned. Word does spread about what type of pledging the fraternities exercise, and the ones going over the top with intense hazing are doomed to decline in popularity.

The best argument as to why the university should not concern itself with fraternity pledging is because the pledging process should be a contract between the individual student and the fraternity. If a student or pledge is upset or uncomfortable with a fraternity’s deeds he should leave. There is no need to make the situation any more complicated than that. I am in no way advocating violent or “intense” hazing, but when one joins a Greek organization, he shoulders the responsibility of the group’s requirements. If he does not find those requirements acceptable, he may always leave the group, but there is no need to complain to someone else and in doing so take away the opportunities of others.

Justin Poythress is a sophomore in Vanderbilt's Peabody College.

The 'S' in Harvard Stands for 'Sex'

The Frat Boy News Daily College Column
By Daniel E. Herz-Roiphe, The Harvard Crimson

Life is pretty tough for abstainers. As if dealing with Harvard’s debaucherous social scene weren’t enough, recently they were also faced with a non-mandatory workshop on sexual well-being. Will it ever end?

Well, if some campus conservatives have their way, it will. The college-sponsored event “Hooking Up at Harvard” has some students decrying what they view as shameless promotion of premarital sex by the college administration.

Of course, any time sex comes up, some Victorian sensibilities might be offended. But the only real difference between “Hooking Up” and any other wellness event is the titillating topic.

The college is in the business of promoting the wellbeing of students and, as Susan B. Marine, director of the Women’s Center, wrote in an e-mail to a concerned student, “Access to information about sexual health, decision-making, and well-being is an integral part of adulthood, and our role as educators is to enable all students who wish to learn about their own development to have access to accurate, meaningful information.”

While a college event promoting one side of a controversial political topic would be inappropriate, “Hooking Up at Harvard” didn’t espouse an ideology; it simply provided information. The tagline of the program explicitly includes our “Future” sex lives, making it clear that the event’s organizers did not believe that every student is, or should be, having sex. At the event itself, Madison tried to dispel the stigma associated with virginity, and emphasized good choices rather than promiscuity. If the idea of someone talking about (gasp) anal sex in public still bothers you, then I’m pleased to inform you that you don’t have to attend.

While it may come as a surprise, there are students at Harvard who want to have sex. We shouldn’t deny them the opportunity of learning about sexual well-being just because the mere mention of the topic offends a few delicate souls.

How To Give a Blowjob With Strep Throat

The Frat Boy News Daily College Column
By Eve, George Washington University's sex columnist for The GW Hatchet

Can I give a guy a blowjob if I have strep throat? Since I'm on antibiotics for it, my birth control isn't working and I want to do something.
- Sore but Sexy in Ivory Tower

Let me preface this by saying that you can do whatever you want. But now I'm going to do everything in my power to talk you out of performing this disgusting, slimy, swollen debacle of oral sex. Strep throat in grown-ups is often characterized by a high fever, difficulty swallowing, shortness of breath, and a pus-like coating over the tonsils. For starters, you probably are not able to breathe out your nose when you have strep, so you might pass out during the act. Everybody loves a half-finished blow job and an unconscious chick.

Second of all, you have pus on your tonsils. That pus is what makes your throat burn. When it interacts with semen (which it will do even if you do not let him finish in your mouth, hell-O, pre-cum?), it will feel like his penis just shot fire into your throat. Sexy.

And third, poorly treated strep throat can lead to a myriad of diseases. Even on antibiotics, stressing out your throat when you have strep can lead to rheumatic fever. Rheumatic fever is a disease from, like, the Oregon Trail that causes damage to your heart valves and can kill you. Do you really want your gravestone to read "Here Lies Sore and Horny, Who Could Not Wait Until the Pus Cleared from Her Throat to Give Head. Now She's Dead."

So, like I said, do whatever you want. But giving head when you have strep throat is gross. And you'll die.

Duke Girls Want To Have Sex Like Guys

The Frat Boy News Daily Campus Column
By Shadee Malaklou, The Duke Chronicle Online

As a retired sex kitten, I understand the appeal: The echo of a pounding beat in a dimly lit room, the triumph of a dry hump, the print of rosy lipstick on a frat guy's cigarette and the sound and fury of college life, a la Old School and Animal House. It's almost irresistible� until about midway through college.

When it comes to sex, Duke women don't have much of a choice. It's either hookup or bust. Duke is not a sexually predatory campus, but in the words of Donna Lisker, director of the Women's Center, men set Duke's social rules.

Although the hookup culture is painted as full of sexual agency, it's not. Women are free to participate in the culture but not to make any demands-or to attempt to change it.

The problem with the hookup culture is two-fold: Many Duke women are lying to themselves about what they really want out of a hookup; and furthermore, many of them are not having satisfying sexual experiences with Duke men. Despite the fact that sex culture on college campuses-and at Duke especially-now supports the idea that a woman can have sex like a man, women themselves still feel alienated from their libidos.

To quote a friend: "Why should women want to have sex like a guy? I tried it for about a year and realized I was just fooling myself."

I'd like to think that most of the time, a woman initiates sex because she really, truly is aroused and because that sexual encounter is going to somehow scratch the itch. But as this column (past and present) has attempted to show, this isn't always the case. As prevalent as the discussion on hookup culture has been during my time as an undergraduate, the women of my generation still don't want sex for sex.

To quote another friend: "I'm not sure I've ever had sex like a man. Regardless of what the context is, having sex is still letting someone be really, really close to you. It takes a connection that's more than just physical attraction. I don't want to have sex with a stranger."

It is important for us to ask, in the aftermath of "sex and scandal" at Duke, what does sexual agency at Duke look like? Is sexual agency the sound of clanking heels and the work of sorority women post-Jungle Juice? Is it the confused ramblings of a sex activist who dances on tables? Is it both? Or is it neither? Does sexual agency even exist? Or is it a long-lost dream we once had?

Four years into the hookup culture, I'm still a woman who loves her stiletto heels and at least the notion of sexual liberation. I'm just not convinced it works. And I'm not convinced that, upon graduation, I will be able to say that I've had many fulfilling sexual experiences or that my sexual agency was as strong as I claimed it to be.

At Duke, there seems to be a fine line between being sexually liberated and sexually used, and many Duke women-myself included-do not know how to maneuver that line. Forget emotional satisfaction; the sex itself isn't good. Most sexual encounters at Duke, despite the great opportunity for female sexual agency, still end up being about the man and about male pleasure. We dance in foam. We wrestle in KY Jelly. We ride the Shooters' mechanical bull. And we do it all for the voyeuristic pleasure of Duke men.

As women, we might not be as sexually liberated as we think. Our sexual mantras may be strong, but our sexual experiences are not; and what we really want out of a hookup still remains unexpressed. Until our experiences and desires catch up with our heavy words, it's a man's hookup world. We're just living in it.

Wisconsin "Whiskey Dick"

The Frat Boy News Daily College Column
By Jenny Kalaidis, Sex Columnist, The University of Wisconsin's Badger Herald

Dear Jenny,
I met this girl at a party, and we ended up hooking up. However, I was really drunk and “couldn’t get it up.” We ended up meeting a few other nights — always while being drunk — and tried again, but I still couldn’t get hard enough. Is there anything I can do? I’ve had drunk sex before and haven’t had this much of a problem, and I know a lot of people can still have sex even though they’re drunk.

Dear Can’t Get It Up,
First of all, you’re not alone. Many guys have a similar problem — it’s called “whiskey dick,” which, defined by Urban Dictionary, is “when you’ve had too much to drink and have a girl back home and can’t get it up to perform the deed.” My best advice to you is both very complicated, yet very simple at the same time: Don’t get so wasted.

Partying around campus is basically a synonym for binge drinking. According to my psychology class, binge drinking is defined as five or more drinks for males and four or more drinks for females. I’ll be the first to acknowledge that these statistics may sadly sound low to many people — it is not at all uncommon for people to have an excess of 10 drinks throughout a night.

So, I’m assuming in your case, you are probably exceeding the five-drink recommendation, which was the culprit of your sexual deficiencies. Right up to the act, you may feel fine. You’re most likely horny and ready to go, but the frustration sets in when your body won’t oblige to what you want it to do. You’ve been cursed with a case of whiskey dick.

Now, I don’t know the exact specifics of your situation, but I assume the girl was in a similar non-sober state of mind, which is most likely why she’s given you numerous chances to redeem yourself.

However, a girl can only be so patient. If you plan on seeing this girl again — and pleasing her at the same time — lay off the bottle a bit. Let’s say you try to stay under the magic five number, and see what happens. If you still can’t get it up, maybe there are some other issues. Maybe you’re not into having random sex? Perhaps you have other worries (i.e. school, work, etc.) on your mind? Or, by chance, this particular girl doesn’t appeal to you enough.

All of those could be possibilities; however, my professional diagnosis is that you had a moderate to severe case of whiskey dick, which can be treated very easily and painlessly by not getting so drunk.

Blame The Frat, Not The Media

The Frat Boy News Daily College Column
By David Asman, The University of Georgia's Red & Black Mailbox

If any organization does not wish to be associated with the actions of select members, it is the responsibility of the organization to disband its ties to those members.

In light of the recent drug allegations surrounding the three University students who all are coincidentally members of the same (AEPi) fraternity, I can understand the outrage and outcry of those members who have done nothing wrong.

That being said, their attention should be directed not toward the media, but rather at their own brotherhood for not having taken preemptive action to avoid the inevitable spotlight.

The risk management policy of AEPi Fraternity, Inc. that is sworn to by the members of the executive board to enforce and uphold states, "The possession, sale or use of illegal drugs or controlled substances while on campus premises or during a fraternity event or at any event that an observer would associate with the fraternity is strictly prohibited."

One of the charged students is alleged to have been in possession of "illegal drugs" on campus. The other two students, while not on campus or at a fraternity event, live in a house fully occupied by members of AEPi.

As an "observer," I associate their living arrangements with the fraternity, in accordance with their own policy.

Unfortunately, because the fraternity failed to take action against the accused brothers in an effort to distance itself from the possible tarnishing of its name as a whole, it is forced to suffer the consequence of a besmirched reputation.

Frat Boy News Exclusive:25 Years After His Death, John Belushi Still Reigns Supreme

The Frat Boy News Daily College Column
By The Associated Press

When a force of nature like John Belushi is lost, 25 years isn't time enough to ease the grief or erase the laughter.

Actor-comedian Richard Belzer still dreams about him from time to time, the unselfish friend and "impish genius" who devoured life. John Landis, who directed Belushi in "Animal House" and "The Blues Brothers," is still angry at him for dying foolishly and young.

"Saturday Night Live" creator Lorne Michaels feels an obligation to "restate the obvious," that Belushi was profoundly talented and part of the show's creative DNA.

By most measures, the round comic with the sharp edges left a small body of work when a drug overdose killed him at age 33 in March 1982. But his TV, movie and music performances proved influential, hitting the baby-boomer sweet spot and surviving despite pop culture's truncated attention span.

Belushi burst the seams of comedy alongside like-minded performers and writers energized by the social upheaval of the 1960s and '70s. He helped join humor and pop music in a lasting romance and brought renewed attention to Ray Charles, Aretha Franklin and other R&B giants.

He etched out the start of a promising acting career, and his best movies reshaped industry expectations by catering to newly empowered young consumers and pushing comedy into the blockbuster realm.

His legacy also includes the bleak Hollywood cliche of destructive behavior, now as much on display as ever with the revolving-door rehab stints of Britney Spears and Lindsay Lohan.

For Belushi, his tragic death overshadows but can't diminish his gifts.

In 1978, on the eve of his 30th birthday, Belushi had the No. 1 movie with "Animal House," the No. 1 record (with partner Dan Aykroyd), "Briefcase Full of Blues" and was the heart of television's hottest show.

The world was Belushi's, for better and worse, as his contracts rose from $35,000 for "Animal House" to $2 million and more. As it had for others, success fueled destructive excess.

The comedian was found dead on March 5, 1982, in a hotel bungalow at the Chateau Marmont hotel on the fabled Sunset Strip.

Belushi didn't consider himself an addict despite increasingly prodigious drug use, said Tanner Colby, co-author of the 2005 biography "Belushi" (written with Belushi's widow, Judith Belushi Pisano).

"John Belushi, deep down, was a stable guy who knew who he was, had a lot of confidence, wasn't superficial but with no great internal trouble," Colby said. "I think that what happened to him was largely due to fame. For a year and a half, he was as big as Elvis."

Don't Make Bad Decisions

The Frat Boy News Daily College Column
By Claire St. Amant, Staff Writer, The Baylor Lariat

Pizza binges, parking tickets, forgotten bills and mysterious tattoos. Some choices in college are worse than others.

"A lot of things kids do in college are not the end of the world," Maxey Parrish, journalism lecturer, said. "But there are some decisions that have a lifelong impact." Parrish identified a newfound sense of freedom and a desire to "test the boundaries" as factors for deviant behavior in the college years.

"For many students this is the first time in their lives where they don't have someone telling them right from wrong," he said.

Dr. Tamara Rowatt, senior psychology lecturer said students in college are particularly vulnerable to impulsive behavior, often resulting in harmful consequences. Rowatt cited unsafe and premature sex as one of the common mistakes students make.

"In college, it's a time where men and women are interested in not only pursuing their identities but also relationships," she said.

Jacob Taylor, a 2006 graduate, said he is already realizing how different things are in the working world than in college.

"I feel like college is the only time in your life when you can act impulsively and get away with it," he said. "In the real world it doesn't work like that." Although Taylor said he didn't do the "typical college party scene," he remembers having plenty of "crazy times" with friends.

"I've done some stupid things that were drinking-related," he said. "I don't really regret it, but I wouldn't do it now."

Hard Nipples at GW

The Frat Boy News Daily College Column
By Eve, George Washington University Sex Columnist

Since we started soliciting questions, I have been getting some fabulously interesting ones, but also some terribly offensive ones.

Listen, folks, I am a sex columnist, and I know that phrases like "jizz juice" and "donkey punch" come with the territory. But I am not a smelly pirate whore, so whoever you are who anonymously sent me the note about how much you "love to make your girlfriend get on her knees three times a day. I love to make her feel submissive, like she's nothing," you are writing to the wrong girl. I love sex, and I love kink, but I love people, too. Get it right or cut it off.

And now, a genuinely interesting question from a super sexy GW nymphet.

Dear Eve,

Do girls notice when guys have hard-ons as much as we notice when their nipples are hard?

-Can't Stand Up After Class in a Chilly Room

Not even close. Nipples are not called "headlights" for no reason: they are bright and obvious. We can't sit down and hide our nipples. We can't put a notebook over our nipples. We can't tuck our nipples under our belt (which is a very clever move, you sly boots). The penis, though much larger (in most cases) than any nipple, is much more easily concealed.

Obviously, when we are pressed against you, we can feel your erection quite distinctly. This is a good thing if we have decided to lie down in a bed with you or let you press us up against a wall and kiss us like you haven't kissed in years. This is a bad thing if you are a stranger in a club or at a bar. Note the distinction.

Duke Needs To Avoid "Culture of Excess"

The Frat Boy News Daily College Column
By Eric Ferreri and Jane Stancill, Staff Writers for The News & Observer

After nine months of study spurred by the lacrosse scandal, a campus culture committee at Duke has made 28 recommendations to promote diversity, strike a balance in athletics and change a "culture of excess."

The report, released today by the university, takes a critical view of Duke's social life. Housing policies allow large groups of friends, fraternity or sorority members to live together and occupy large chunks of space, resulting in cliquish, racially segregated dorms that unfairly favor male students, the report said. Students too often drink to get drunk, it said, leading to bad behavior, impaired health and lost weekends.

"There's definitely a theme in this report of pushing in our students the philosophy of respect," said Robert Thompson, a dean and co-chairman of the committee.

Among the proposals: mandate one course about race, religious, gender or socio-economic difference in the United States; drop the practice of allowing student groups larger than 12 people to live together; enforce alcohol regulations; and establish a bar on campus where students over 21 can drink in a responsible way. Other recommendations have to do with admissions and athletics, including more faculty oversight in both areas. Proposals include cutting travel and practice time for athletes, establishing a higher admissions bar for athletes and aggressively recruiting more minority and international students in general.

In a prepared statement, Duke President Richard Brodhead said none of the recommendations is a done deal. The conversation begins now about where to go next, he said. "This is a time for vigorous debate, which is a healthy thing in a university," he said.

The discussion will no doubt be heated. Reallocating precious real estate on the Gothic quads is sure to stir controversy, but Thompson said the current room assignment policy promotes division among students.

"The process causes some students to feel less privileged and less empowered," he said.

In 1995, former Duke President Nan Keohane moved all freshmen to Duke's East Campus. The change was greeted angrily by many alumni, but has since been accepted and viewed as a success. Some of the new recommendations will likely be followed as the university builds a new Central Campus with apartment-style living for older students.

Why Your Girlfriend Fakes Orgasms

The Frat Boy News Daily College Column
By Elizabeth Stortoen, the University of Colorado's Campus Press

It's that feeling, rush and explosion that engulfs your body. Your heart beats faster, your hormones start to race, you can't breathe, your mind goes blank, your toes curl up and you can't stop screaming: "YES! YES! YES!"

Does this sound familiar? To some, this would be called an orgasm. It's that moment during intercourse when you reach your ultimate climax, and you can't contain yourself anymore. But to others, this is simply how to fake an orgasm.

So why do women fake it?

Why do they moan and groan so their partner can feel accomplished and raise his hands above his head and say, "Yes! I did it!"?

Typically, women fake orgasms so their partner won't feel let down. They are trying to protect their partner's feelings and not send the message that they are not physically attracted to them. Women don't want men to think they don't appreciate them.

"I think it is common (to fake orgasms) for women. They are influenced by the media and porn culture of what they think they should be doing, feeling and sounding like," said Sarah Perzow, a sophomore psychology major.

Perzow said it is sad how common faking orgasms has become. She believes there is nowhere for women to learn how to have sex right, and until then, faking orgasms will keep happening.

Nowadays, sex has become this object, and its main purpose is to get one another off. The meaning of sex has changed; it has become a competition. The lines have been blurred between sensual arousal, intimate feelings and orgasms.

I hate to be the bearer of bad news for men, but it takes a lot more to please a woman than it takes to please you. So be patient, take your time and get to know her body.

A woman's body is sexually aroused differently than a man's. According to WebMD, "Many women find it hard to reach orgasm during intercourse without some kind of simultaneous clitoral stimulation."

If this is the case, the lines of communication need to be open. Each partner needs to be able to talk about what satisfies him or her, what is the right spot to touch and how to do it, because a healthy sexual relationship cannot be built on lies and fear.

In the 2000 Orgasm Survey, 72 percent of women reported having faked it at least once in their current or most recent relationship. While on the other side, 55 percent of men say they can tell when their partner is faking it.

If this sounds all too familiar to any of you, remember each person is different and each sexual experience is different. What might have worked in the past might be the exact opposite of what you need to do in the future.

"Having sex in college is different than later on in life," said Chen Wang, a senior biochemistry major. "There is always so much hype about what you did over the weekend or who you did. The pressure is there on both sides. I think women faking orgasms has become part of life. Everyone knows they do. It is just the whole determining when they are doing it."

According to Hugo Mialon, a graduate student from the University of Texas who did his dissertation research on the study of orgasms through constitutional law, "It is more common for women who are very young or very old to fake an orgasm."

Mialon found in his research that women do not reach their sexual peak until around age 30. This means more focus must be put forward in these earlier years to truly understand the female body and what makes her hot.

Most of the fun about sex is talking about it. So be open to this discussion. Talk about your fantasies with one another, try to wear something extra sexy, use toys or oils if need be and, most importantly, find your special spot that makes your body go numb.

Sex is not just something that men do to women; women need to learn to take more control. You need to be able to tell your partner what makes you go, "Oh!" You are only hurting yourself by not helping your partner find your special spot because once that spot is found, you may begin to wonder how you ever survived by just faking it.

Contact Campus Press Staff Writer Elizabeth Stortroen at Elizabeth.Stortroen@thecampuspress.com

Hey Guys, Can I Come To Your Party?

The Frat Boy News Daily College Column
By Tim Engle, McClatchy Newspapers

Dear guys in the apartment on the top floor, Welcome to the building.

And now that we have the niceties out of the way, did you two know you're not the only people who live here? Surprise! And there are a few other things we need to tell you:

Fun as it must be to toss beer bottles from your balcony down to the street, it's time to face reality: You're not living in the frat house anymore. And no doubt you want to unwind when you get home from work at 2 in the morning, but playing "Black Magic Woman" over and over at top volume really isn't cool. Most of us actually have to sleep at night.

Next time you're having a party (tonight - right?), please ask your friends not to park in spaces reserved for residents. Also, if you'd like to avoid having the police show up again, try inviting your neighbors.

Don't leave your laundry in the washing machines or dryers for hours after it's done.

Don't run the vacuum after, say, 10 at night. Or, in your guys' case, don't throw bowling balls at the wall then. (Or whatever it is you're doing.) Don't run up the stairs late at night.

Don't put a bunch of junk or trash outside your door. It's not very sanitary, and sometimes it smells bad.

Standing out in the hallway smoking isn't exactly taking it outside. Your smoke rolls right under other people's doors. Really, all we're talking about is common courtesy here. Now that we have all that out of the way, when's the party? What can we bring?

Sincerely,

Your neighbors

P.S. Those obnoxious wind chimes - those aren't yours, are they?